Sneaking food is a sign that something is going on with your child. Let’s look at why kids sneak food and how you can help. 

Is your family going through cereal faster than usual? Does your child disappear into the kitchen for long periods? Are you finding empty food wrappers tucked away under the sofa, mattress, pillow, or in your child’s room?

Your child might be sneaking food.

The child who is eating in secret raises red flags and may have an impact on parents and the family functioning. There are several reasons why a child might sneak food, and some of these have nothing to do with hunger.

As a pediatric dietitian who works with families, I know this can be a tricky dynamic to tackle. In this article, I go over some physical and emotional reasons children may be sneaking food from the kitchen, and give you some tips for a gentler approach to curbing these food behaviors.

Why Would a Child Sneak Food?

Sneaking food is not an act of defiance. It’s a sign that something is going on with your child, whether it be negative emotions for which food is providing solace, or easing boredom. But it’s important to get to the root causes and underlying reasons.

Some children live with hunger because of neglect and food insecurity, and sneaking or hiding food may be a way to cope, and a matter of survival. Let’s dive into a few reasons for sneak eating that’s not related to physical hunger.

Food is Restricted or Tightly Controlled 

One of the reasons children sneak food has to do with food parenting.

We all want our kids to eat healthy food, but trying to control what a child eats with pressure, or by restricting snacks or “junk” food affects eating behaviors… and not in the way you might want.

When parents restrict food, children may have feelings of deprivation, seek food, and eat when they’re not hungry.

Restricting food might be your first instinct when you discover your child is taking food without permission. That rarely works and may do more harm than good.

Instead of controlling your child’s food intake, encourage your child’s autonomy with food. I know, that seems counterintuitive.

When kids are allowed to take part in the decision-making with food (rather than be controlled or take control), they are less likely to eat when they’re not hungry.

Adult Attitudes About Weight and Larger Bodies

The fear of weight gain in our culture influences a lot of what we believe, and how we act, around food and eating.

Unfortunately, how family members perceive their child’s size and eating habits may affect their child’s body image and eating behaviors.

One study found that a parent’s over-investment in their child’s size affected everyone in the home.

Commenting about a child’s weight, how much they eat, or about their body size negatively affects body image. This kind of weight stigma causes feelings of shame, a negative body image, and may play a role in developing binge eating disorder (BED).

Another factor that increases the risk of a child becoming a binge eater is whether a parent has an active eating disorder. Children of parents with BED are more likely to binge eat compared to children of larger-bodied parents who do not have an eating disorder.

Furthermore, research shows that children of parents who are larger overeat compared to children of average size parents.

Parents are one of the biggest environmental influences in raising a healthy child.

Unlimited Screen Time

There are many reasons to limit screen time. More screen time usually means less physical activity (especially outdoors with friends!) and is associated with an increased risk of developing health conditions.

According to a recent study, kids who spend more time in front of screens are more likely to sneak food, hide, and hoard it. When kids eat in front of the TV, they may ignore their hunger signals and feelings of fullness.

And, television and social media may play a role in how a child feels about their body.

How to Help a Child Who is Sneaking Food

You might be distressed and confused when you discover food in unusual places. Or, maybe you haven’t found evidence, but your child is mysteriously experiencing weight gain. First, take a deep breath. While this is disturbing, it’s not insurmountable.

As a parent, it’s natural to worry about children who sneak food. Worry is normal because you want to promote healthy eating, avoid creating more problems, and correct any potential dysfunctional eating behaviors.

But when it comes to emotional issues and eating behaviors, it’s best not to make a child feel like he’s doing something wrong. In my experience, a strong reaction to how and what a child eats can negatively affect their healthy relationship with food for years to come.

I have a few ideas to help navigate the situation if your child is a food sneaker.

Serve Regular Meals and Snacks

First, rule out physiologic reasons for hunger. Are meals and snacks happening every three to four hours? Are they nutritious and filling? If not, rectify this. Your child may be more hungry because they’re not getting their basic needs met – enough food, and filling types of food, throughout the day.

Use Positive Food Parenting

Next, check in with yourself and make sure you’re not being too restrictive or controlling with sweet foods or treat food. When you become restrictive (and this can happen when we see our kids being overly interested in food, or overeating), a vicious cycle happens. 

You take food away, and your child wants it more. This desire can turn into food-seeking behaviors, like sneaking, hiding, or hoarding food.

The opposite can be happening, too. You don’t have enough structure and boundaries in the home food environment and your child (who may be more food responsive) has a hard time controlling themselves in the presence of food access. 

Negative Experiences and Emotional Distress

Check in with your child. Did something happen that has them emotionally upset? Were they bullied? Teased? Or is your child struggling with low self-esteem or mental health issues? Negative events can prompt some children to sneak food as a coping mechanism, and encourage emotional eating.

Don’t Shame Your Child

Embarrassing and shaming a child (for their body weight, shape or size, or their eating behaviors) doesn’t help change or improve behaviors. It causes negative feelings.

This may lead to poor self-esteem, a negative body image, and an unhealthy relationship with food. Instead, recognize that something deeper may be going on.

Be Patient

It takes time to get to the root of sneaking food. Consult professional help like a registered dietitian or mental health provider (if emotional reasons are present). Help your child develop a positive relationship with food.

Check In with Your Food Beliefs

Diet culture is everywhere. Be aware of how you might impose your thoughts about body shape and body size on your child.

Watching your child struggle with sneaking food, especially when you may have had an eating disorder in the past, or negative food beliefs or body biases you’re working through, can be challenging.

Resources

• A pediatric dietitian or mental health professionals with experience in disordered eating can help guide your child and give you a few more tools for your parenting toolbox to help you raise a child with a healthier relationship with food. 
• If your child shows signs of an eating disorder, consult with your pediatrician about a referral to an eating disorder specialist. 
• Learn more about common eating disorders that affect children and how to reach out for help in our The Eating Disorder Guide.
• Related Reading: 10 Reasons Your Child Eats Too Much
• Check out my new book: Kids Thrive at Every Size: How to Nourish Your Big, Small, or In-Between Child for a Lifetime of Health and Happiness!