Learn how the 90 – 10 Rule for food helps balance sweets and treats in your child’s diet with nutritious foods for growth and development.

One of the most common concerns of parents today is about sweets and treats in a child’s diet. Sugary, sweet foods and high-fat, fried foods (or sometimes both!) are everywhere, all the time in our children’s day. Balancing them in a healthy diet can be tricky.

I use a simple approach I developed back in the early 2000’s when I was working in private practice in Nashville. I call it the 90 – 10 Rule. It’s a balanced approach to navigating unhealthy foods so they don’t provide extra calories or change healthy eating habits.

The families I work with think it’s pretty effective! 

What are Sweets and Treats?

Sweets and treats are those foods that contain high amounts of sugar or fat, and as a result, extra calories. Think fast food, fried food, soft drinks, and desserts. They have a lot of flavor, but are low in nutrition. More examples include birthday cake, cupcakes, cookies, soda, candy, bagged chips, and French fries. These foods are also yummy and attractive, making them irresistible for young children and older ones.

When eaten regularly, they can undermine a healthy eating plan, change food preferences away from nutrient-dense foods, and may cause weight problems. 

Some parents think they need to be completely avoided, but I don’t believe that’s necessary. Tightly controlling sweets and treats can backfire, disturbing a healthy relationship with food. Forbidding sweets and treats can be too restrictive, and this may lead to sneaking food or overeating these foods when they’re available. 

What is the 90 – 10 Rule?

Many kids can’t get through the day without being offered treats. They show up at school, in athletic venues, at church, friend’s houses, and more.

The 90 – 10 Rule differentiates nourishing foods from sweets and treats, and creates a nutritious balance that can support healthy meals and food enjoyment, too. 

The Rule makes it easy to assess a variety of food, categorize them, and decide how they will fit into the daily food intake. 

The best part? Kids understand this concept and use it.

How to Use the 90 – 10 Rule for Food 

Here’s how I teach families to use the 90 – 10 Rule, step-by-step.

Step One: Choose Mostly Nourishing Foods for Meals and Snacks

Nourishing foods come from the food groups found in the dietary guidelines, specifically the MyPlate guide, and include mostly whole foods and nutrient-dense processed foods:

• Lean protein sources such as egg, red meat, chicken, lamb, and beans
• Dairy products such as whole and low-fat milk, and milk products like yogurt and cottage cheese
• Fruit (all varieties; fresh fruit, 100% fruit juice in small portions)
• Vegetables (all types; frozen, canned, dried, and fresh)  
• Whole grains such as whole wheat bread, whole grain cereal, pasta and rice
• Oils, mostly from plants, like olive oil

Ninety percent (90%) of your child’s calorie intake during the day should come from these nourishing food items.

Step Two: Identify Sweets and Treats 

Identify the typical sweets and treats your child encounters, including: 

• Desserts like cake, cookies, brownies, ice cream, etc
• Candy
• Sugary beverages like lemonade, sweet tea, and other sugar-sweetened beverages
• Fried food such as potato chips, tortilla chips, French fries, chicken nuggets, and onion rings
• Sweetened breakfast cereal
• Sports drinks 

Step Three: Determine the Food Balance

Talk with your child and decide together which sweets and treats are important to them. This will guide decisions about what they will choose to eat during the day, and when.

10% of what your child eats during the day, on average, comes from sweets and treats. 

For most healthy, growing kids, this will end up being 1 or 2 sweets or treats, on average, each day, in age-appropriate portion sizes.

Examples of the 90 – 10 Rule in Real-Life

When you start using the 90 – 10 Rule, make sure your child understands which foods fall into each category, and which foods they should eat most of the time. When possible, let your child choose which sweets or treats they want to eat. This will give them a sense of control and build their autonomy. 

At a Party

Your child has a party after the school play or at the end of the school year. There will be lots of treat foods available. Describe what will be available, like soda, chips and ice cream. Help your child choose which sweets and treats they like and want the most. Will it be the soda or the ice cream? The chips and soda? Encourage the foods that are most desirable and meaningful for them. 

Keep in mind: Celebratory parties are not the normal eating pattern. Having the experience without restriction is more important than strictly adhering to the 90-10 rule. You can always modify what you feed your child the next day to reset the overall food balance.

At Church

Sally will have donuts after church on Sunday, but there will also be cake and ice cream at the afternoon birthday party she is attending. Her parent encourages her to think about how she will balance these sweets and treats. Following the 90 – 10 Rule, Sally opts for cake and ice cream at the party and skips the donuts at church.

At Sporting Events  

Brent is playing baseball in the afternoon and he usually grabs a slushy drink at the concession stand. He’s been using the 90-10 rule for a while. Instead of eating dessert after dinner, he passes on the bowl of ice cream, remembering he had a slushy drink earlier at the ballpark. 

Is It Easier to Avoid Sweets and Treats?

As parents, we know there are endless options for treats, sweets, and snacks throughout the day.

Eliminating them is not practical. Outside of your home, your child will inevitably encounter them. Food restriction, or tightly controlling sweets, is a counterproductive feeding practice. Research tells us that some children may become more responsive and attracted to foods that are scarce or forbidden, potentially sneaking or overeating them when they can.

Balancing the diet with nutritious foods and sweets and treats is really the key to healthy eating. It’s the best of both worlds: balanced, nutritious food for growth, development and health, plus tasty, indulgent foods to satisfy desire and enjoyment, and help children learn to navigate these foods.

Sweets and treats, sugary drinks, and fried foods are not going to disappear. They’re prominent in our modern world and will continue to be. When you try to emiminate them or control your child’s eating, your child may struggle with food.

Lifelong Health Benefits of the 90-10 Rule 

The goal here is to help your child pause and think through what they will eat during the day, and give them an opportunity to think ahead and practice decision-making skills with eating. This means you are shifting a bit of the food decision-making over to your child. Kids are concrete thinkers. The 90 – 10 Rule aligns with their thought processes. Kids can  identify sweets and treats easily. They can make choices about which ones they want to eat, and fully enjoy them. Making positive, thoughtful decisions about what to eat is a skill that can last a lifetime!

Have you tried the 90 – 10 Rule? How did it go?

Resources

• Our on demand library of workshops, classes and guidebooks to help you feed better so your child can eat better.
• The Nourished Child Blueprint – our signature course about food, feeding and child development.
• Kids Thrive at Every Size: How to Nourish Your Big, Small, or In-Between Child for a Lifetime of Health and Happiness

This article was updated from its original in May 2025.