Many parents want to raise children who enjoy food, eat well, and grow into confident, competent eaters. But often, our own relationship with food gets in the way. In this episode of The Nourished Child® Podcast, I talk with registered dietitian and eating disorder specialist Jessica Setnick about how parents can heal their relationship with food – and why that’s essential for raising competent eaters.

Why Your Relationship with Food Matters

Children are always watching. The way you approach eating – whether with peace, guilt, control, or flexibility – sends powerful messages. If you’ve struggled with dieting, emotional eating, or food rules, you might unintentionally pass those struggles on.

Jessica calls this your “inner eater.” By learning to heal your inner eater, you free yourself from food battles and give your child the best chance to develop a healthy, relaxed relationship with food.

The Three Inner Eaters

Jessica shares that we all have three “eaters” inside us:

1. The Restrictor – driven by food rules, diets, and control.
   
2. The Indulger – often eating for comfort, pleasure, or escape.
   
3. The Competent Eater – the balanced voice that eats with self-trust, attunement, and joy.

Healing your relationship with food means recognizing which eater is running the show, and strengthening your competent eater so it can take the lead.

How to Start Healing Your Relationship with Food

Jessica offers practical steps parents can take:

• Notice your food talk. The words you use about your body and eating affect your child’s food confidence.
  
• Challenge diet culture. Social norms often tell us we’re not eating “right.” Learning to question these messages is essential.
  
• Practice self-compassion. Food is not just fuel, it’s cultural, emotional, and social. Allow yourself grace.
  
• Model competence. Show your child that food can be enjoyed without extremes of restriction or indulgence.

Raising Competent Eaters in a Diet-Obsessed World

Healing your relationship with food not only supports your own well-being – it also empowers you to raise competent eaters. When children see food as enjoyable, non-threatening, and free from shame, they are more likely to:

• Develop resilience against diet culture pressures.
  
• Listen to their bodies.
  
• Try new foods.

Listen to the full conversation with Jessica Setnick on The Nourished Child Podcast for practical insights, supportive strategies, and encouragement to heal your relationship with food and raise competent eaters.

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Resources & Links

• Jessica Setnick’s Website
• Healing Your Inner Eater
• Kids Thrive at Every Size (Book)
• The Nourished Child Blueprint